This is no gift economy.
You live in a tyranny of equality. 
The dictator--you--deals
in judgment, payment, 
enforced retribution:

an eye for a lie
a tooth for a truth, damage
in exchange for pain.

(except where the pain is penance 
for a debt only you can see.)

Any generosity exacts payment, with interest.
There is only being even.

Imagine a government
Where a gift is a gift and not
an obligation, where retribution
is subject to the government of grace
How would you then give?