Thursday, February 1, 2007

Tiger Food?

It MUST be tiger food!

A very eventful day in the small-town coffee shop. Apparently, there is a mentally handicapped student who lately has been getting his kicks from pulling fire alarms all over town. He is currently suspended from school because they couldn't stop him from pulling alarms there. So today, he was in the shop with his grandfather and father, and just as they were going out the door, he reached out and pulled the alarm. the fire department called soon after, and I told them it was a false alarm, a student had pulled it, so the fire chief (who is, of course, slightly related to me) came down and lectured the poor kid (apparently for the umpteenth time). The kid looked apologetic and gleeful by turns. He would laugh loudly at the noise, and then clap his hand over his mouth and repeat his version of the words "I'm sorry" over and over again...penitence spoiled, unfortunately, by another inevitable guffaw.

Indy returned to the store, though I was spared having to say no to another autograph because this time, he asked for mine! (????)

Then the best one of the day...a family with three small blonde boys, triplets, were browsing through the store. The boys wandered about while their parents were hunting for some needed Bible study books. The three of them chatted amicably while they waited, conversing about a joke book, a book about birds, and a book about cats. They then wandered over to our gift display shelves, which have some bags of coffee beans for sale, quite properly labled with the type of beans and our logo, a picture of a laughing or yowling cat cartoon. One boy picked up a bag and asked the other two what they thought it was. One of them replied, as he pinched it experimentally, that he didn't know. But the other, daring to think out of the realm of knowledge, took the bag, looked wisely at the label, and said "It MUST be for tigers....maybe it's tiger food." with this, he set it back on the shelf as his two brothers inclined their heads and rounded their mouths in "Aha!" expressions, and I inwardly shrieked with laughter.

ah, what a great last day.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Beginning and ending

For starters...I'm sitting here eating chicken noodle soup and listening to "When I fall in Love" by Celine Dion. No kidding, folks. (well, it is on the soundtrack to Sleepless in Seattle, so you have to put up with it in order to get the rest of the music).

and for the rest of the story, I discovered this great book. It's called Grave Matters, and it's basicall reprints of unique and interesting epitaphs from all over the world. here are a few that made me smile.

JOHN HALL, GROCER

Here lie the remains of
JOHN HALL, grocer
The world is not worth a fig, and I have good raisins for saying so.

Dunmore, Ireland 1790

**********

This one's rather clever...

GRACE STEVENS

What tho'enclosed in silent celle,
Grace for a space with worms may dwell,
This truth we find in sacred story,
Death cannot long keep Grace from Glory.

Atherton, England 1652

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MRS. PENNY

Reader, if cash thou are in want of any
Dig five-feet deep, and you will find a penny.

England c. 1750

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this one's slightly shocking...

WARREN GIBBS

Warren Gibbs
Died by arsenic poisoning
Mar. 23, 1860

Think my friends when this you see
how my wife has done for me
she in some oysters did prepare
some poison for my lot and fare
then of the same I did partake
and Nature yielded to its fate
before she my wife became
Mary Felton was her name.

Pelham, Mass, 1860

********

MARY MARTIN

Here lies the wife of Roger Martin
She was a good wife to Roger, that's sartin.

Ockham, England, c. 1800

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ELIZABETH HAMILTON

Here lies the body of
Elizabeth
wife of Major General Hamilton

Who was married forty-seven years
and never did ONE thing
To disoblige her husband.

London, England 1746